I told him, 'This is a horrific life, it isn't fair.' I know there were a lot of women that wanted to marry Arafat. However, it was my fate and I cannot do anything about it. I tried to leave him hundreds of times, but he wouldn't let me. Everyone knows how he wouldn't permit me to leave. Especially those in his servitude, they know very well what it was like. Yes, I am regretful. Even when he was with me, I was forced to defend myself.