Atash Khayyer, a movie actor who died at the age of 34

While it’s okay to admit you don’t know what to say, there are things you should prepare yourself NOT to say.

• Avoid making comparisons (“My aunt has cancer, and she’s up and around!”).
• Avoid doom-and-gloom stories (“There was someone at my office who died from this kind of cancer”).
• Don’t talk about or even suggest blame (“Were you ever a smoker?”).
• Don’t offer unsolicited advice (“Have you tried…”).

Other things said about cancer or a person’s situation may seem well-intentioned, but can come off wrong. Avoid statements like these when talking to someone who has cancer. They happen to be some of the phrases cancer patients’ say “bug us most.”